For those in a lovely, warm and fuzzy relationship, the yearly dilemma of how to celebrate Valentine's day is looming on the horizon. Do you spend it at the cinema, not actually talking or interacting with each other, being forced to watch a predictably dry rom-com (vom), something which you would never dream of watching, let alone inflicting upon someone you like? Or how about a limp, over-priced three-course disappointment where you are forced to sit chair-to-chair, overhearing other couples' awkward conversations..? As you might have guessed I'm not a fan of Valentine's Day. That said I've had a hella fun day imagining the perfect Valentines gifts for imaginary couples. So let the folks at Blitz take the heat-off the present finding minefield, as we guide you through some super-rad ideas for your beau. And for those who are single... I think a little bit of self-gifting might be in order.

COUPLE NO. 1: The Vintage Aficionados
She Likes: Chintz, the 50s,  baking, high-heels, florals, making chutneys, tea-parties and picnincs, collecting vintage photographs, taxidermy, cocktails, poetry and Mad Men.
He likes: playing vinyl on old record players, real ale, briefcases, tweed and check, Bukowski, bourbon in a crystal glass, typewriters, Naval tats, a well-goomed moustache and Mad Men.

Teapot (part of set) £40 / Snakeskin handbag £28 / Tapestry shopper £30 / Silk scarf £10 / Kitten heels £10 /Metallic chain belt £10 / 1950s tea cup & saucer (part of set) £12


Tan leather tote £38 / Blue crocodile handbag £35 / Silk scarf £10 / Bally loafer shoe £45 / Metal cinch belt £12 / Vintage toffee tin £15


Nigella Express £10 / Baking Made Easy by Lorraine Pascale £7 / Leith's Book of Deserts £8 / River Cottage Handbook: Cakes £5 / Tea-cup & Saucer £12 / Italin leather & snake-skin shoes £45 / Assorted brooches £12 each


Bally court shoe £10 / Snakeskin clutch bag £12 / Dooney & Bourke bowling bag £48 / Jug and saucer (with sugar bowl not seen here) £16 / Buttons £10 / Metallic chain belt £10


Mohair wool beaded jumpers £15


Floral shirts with an assortment of collar styles: peter pan collar, frill collar & button down collar £25


Saks 5th Avenue suede brogues £50 / Leather breifcase £60 / Kerouac novels £4 / Ties £5
Hollywood by Charles Bukowski £4 / Fear & Loathing by Hunter S. Thompson £4 / The Death of Bunny Munro by Nick Cave £4 / Leather woven belts £10 / Doctor's bag £42 / Brooks Brother's tasselled loafers £65


'Navy Flake' Vintage Tobacco Tin £8 / 'Gold Label' Vintage Pub Ashtray £25 / Check button-down shirts £10 / Woven leather belt £10


Wool 'Grandad' hats £25 / Aaran knit jumpers & cardigans £40-48

Tomorrow I shall be tackling the 90s Fresh Prince of Bel-Air kids. So watch this space...

Photos & Words by The Calamity Kid. See more from her HERE
Or follow her on Twitter, HERE

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